You are driving along, possibly singing with the children or mentally studying the grocery list, and in a minute everything jerks. Glass breaks, horns blow and your heart calls off to your throat. A car accident does not only spoil your vehicle. It mixes everything around with your feeling of security, particularly with family aboard.
The first few minutes are not when you are considering paperwork or fix-it-stores. You are counting heads, scanning injuries and attempting not to break down in front of your children. When the entire family is involved, the emotional consequences of a crash may still be felt even when the tow truck has already left the scene.
Shock, Then Survival Mode
Each person responds differently when an accident occurs and this applies to your partner, your kids and also yourself. Others may cry and or hold on to you. Others set forth dumb, nearly uncanny quiet. All these are the shock response and there is nothing specific and right to do.
Kids (and the younger ones especially), just acquired a new way of feeling scared in the world. They may fear reentering a car, have nightmares, or begin to ask some difficult questions concerning what might have happened. In the case of adults, there is usually this weird combination of adrenaline and guilt, even in the case you did not cause the accident yourself. It is survival mode, and that is what the brain does because of the mess.
Dealing with the Aftermath (Paperwork, Repairs, and Legal Stuff)
Once the first crisis has been passed, the second one arrives in the form of the logistics crash. Insurance claims. Car rentals. Police reports. As close to the norm, it is pretty normal, except in case you are in luck. However, in the majority of cases, strange events occur, such as the other driver being uninsured or the crash resulting from an unforeseen event, e.g., road hazards.
On some of the occasions, other drivers do not even manage to hit you; they need to be objects.Maybe some log becomes thrown out of the back of some unsecured truckload or parts of metal bouncing down the freeway are hitting your bumper and shoot off.
When flying debris collides with your car, the liability is never apparent especially when it is not possible to ascertain the origin or prove the other party was negligent.
Whenever you are already undergoing a stressful period, learning how these circumstances are dealt with can amount to a sheer load off your shoulders.
Knowing the answers on the legal end means not worrying about one less aspect which can make your panicking process working, and you should just do what is necessary to make your people safe and steady.
Helping Kids Feel Safe Again
Children tend to struggle with fear following a crash, but not in terms that they can express. They can become vehement and detest going in the car, question everything in what-if form, or even be retrogressive back to what they used to do at a younger age. The thing is not necessarily an accident but it is that their sense of stability has been shaken.
Begin with easy reassurance. During this new age when everyone is safe, tell your children that everything is fine and you are trying your level best to keep them safe. You do not want to overburden them with the information they can not possibly digest, and yet at the same time you cannot dismiss their queries. Children are aware of the fact that when adults hide something they are doing it to protect them.
Routines and Reconnection
The reconstruction of routines can be very centering. In case you were doing bedtime stories most of the time, keep on with it. In case you used to stop at the park every day after school, see how you can get back to it, even ten minutes of it. Liberating comforts solidify a sense of ordinary and secure.
And also you can allow them to be involved in the recovery. Perhaps they assist you to check the car are safe every time you want to drive, or they draw pictures on how your family is strong. These minor acts provide them a sense of control, which is what the trauma takes away most of the time.
Healing Together, Not Just Moving On
We adults occasionally believe that we need to be stronger ones, the ones who keep everything together. However, the process of healing is not stuffing the bottle. It is about coming up with the terms to describe what occurred and deciding to rebuild together with one tin-hooded step at a time.
Discuss it at the table, when on walks, even in a car. Inquire about how your partner is doing. Ask yourself to be allowed to feel vibrated, even weeks on. When your family experiences something frightening, this should be noticed. Hiding it under the carpet does not seem to get it lost.
Create Meaning After the Mess
Certain families respond to traumatic events with some sort of ritual and symbols. Possibly it is just a little celebration on the anniversary of the crash, a we-survived dinner. Perhaps it is a list of tunes that made everybody relaxed. The therapeutic value of communicated experiences, no matter how ridiculous or minor, should not be underestimated. They assist in changing the script of We Got Wrecked to we made it.
You’re Not Broken, You’re Different (and That’s OK)
An automobile collision can upset your life in ways that you have not imagined. Yes, you would like to undo things now, make it like it used to be, but that is not going to work, because: you are not the same as before. Not broken. Just changed.
You got to know how your family would appear during an emergency. When it was of actual concern you saw how powerful you were. It is not an easy type of growth and yet it is very effective. Credit yourself not only in the fact that you are still here but that you made appearances in the lives of your people when they needed you the most.
That is what families do. We can be flexed. We are liable to bruise. However, when it matters we tighten our grips onto one another.
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